Over 40 Dating First Impressions
Naturally, I believe in online relationships. You can meet people you should have met, but whose paths you would never have crossed. You can get information on perfect strangers which might take you weeks, maybe months, to accumulate, just by reading a profile and looking at PerfectMatch.com's Duet® Analysis Profile, a revolutionary 360º presentation of its members.
Still, as we all know, there are a few things learned face to face, which is why we all worry about what will happen at the first meeting. The coffee, drink, walk, etc., finally comes, usually after weeks of exchanging emails and phone calls. And then…it is often too quickly and abruptly over. I think that's a flaw in the way a lot of people use the system.
Now, I understand why it's abruptly ended if someone has misrepresented themselves. Perhaps they said they were weight and height proportional, when in reality, they are 75 pounds heavier than promised. Or, perhaps they are 20 years older or younger than they looked in their photo, and you wanted someone the age they presented rather than the age they turned out to be. I understand why this might be the end of story.
But, what if they are only 10 pounds heavier, chattier than you expected, or less successful than you had hoped. Or maybe, they are everything they said they were, but there just wasn't a "spark" between you. In this case, I'd say don't be so hasty! Ever met someone at a party or been introduced somewhere, and felt nothing? Then, over time, you've gotten to know this person and suddenly, one day you realize you are developing a soft spot in your heart for them. You notice your interest perks up when they walk into the room. Haven't you ever surprised yourself about someone and come to like them over time rather than immediately?
Movies are full of plots based on faulty first impressions. The rest of the movie is spent with the two people trying to get over their initial feelings. They begin to realize they were wrong to start with and they might have missed something really important.
So, this is what I'm asking you to think about. Don't be so quick to dismiss someone if they are not exactly as you thought they would be. Don't expect all chemistry to be immediate and strong. Give someone who seems worthwhile a little while longer than you have in the past before you move on. You might discover it was "The One" who almost got away…and it would have been the biggest loss of your life.