A Serious Relationship...Are You Ready?

By Dr. Pepper Schwartz

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Unfortunately, knowing for certain when you are ready for a serious relationship, isn't one of the simpler things in life. There'll come a time when we "think" we're ready. But then, after we've leaped in, we feel like we're drowning, and we start struggling and kicking to get out of the water. This causes sadness, and often anger, to the person we are with. It's usually not something we're proud of doing to another person, or ourselves. So, here're a few tips to consider before you jump off the cliff…and then realize you have no idea how deep the water is.

The very talented and extremely funny comedian, Jeff Foxworthy, used to say, "You know you're a redneck if…". Well, you know you're ready for a serious relationship if:

• You start to be bored when going out with others who are not contenders for a long-lasting future, even if they are handsome or beautiful, smart, entertaining and/or recent lottery winners.
• You don't want to be intimate with anyone if they don't seem like someone you could spend the rest of your life with.
• You are increasingly impatient on outings which seem to lead nowhere except back to square one.
• The content of your conversation changes. You want to know more about someone's values, goals and character instead of "your pad or mine".
• You actively feel lonely a lot of the time. And, this can happen even when you are with someone who is nice, but not necessary for your future.
• You look at magazine pictures you never noticed before: pictures of couples, homes and romantic vacations which center a lot on the couple alone, together or just delighted to have the time away from everyone else.
• The phrase "someone I am comfortable with" seems wonderful and right. You don't have the urge to run in the opposite direction.
• When you're on PerfectMatch.com or meeting another member, you're willing to work very hard and do whatever it takes to meet "The One".
• When you're with someone you really enjoy, you're daydreaming about the future with them, which seems wonderful, and not like a trip to the dentist for twin root canals.

Of course, not all of these things have to be in place. The point is, there's a serious change in your feelings and thinking. These feelings are not the puppy love stuff of infatuation. Rather, they're steady, clear feelings about looking for love and wanting a day-to-day relationship which is honest, loyal, comfortable and profound. When you have these feelings, you are very ready to be committed in the wonderful world of love. And, when you recognize these emotions, it's time to be careful and nurturing in a promising relationship, while exiting the one which is clearly going nowhere!

A serious relationship will be exhilarating, exciting and something to be cherished. Utilizing PerfectMatch.com's vast arsenal of cutting-edge tools is the beginning of a journey you'll talk to your real love about for the rest of your lives!